Girls and Twilight.

First, let me start this off by copy-pasting this ranting I wrote about girls about a year or so ago:

Stupid Girl Behavior and Beliefs Involving Other Girls:

I will never understand why girls have to be so mean and ugly to each other.  Does it really make you feel better to give that girl who is prettier than you a nasty look? Does it really make you feel better to say something ugly about the girl who’s outfit is cuter than yours?! Does it REALLY make you feel better to make up a rumor about a girl who checked out your boyfriend?!?!  Maybe briefly…I have been there.  But, I can also say that in the long run, it does nothing good for you, so cut it out!!! Get along!!!!!!  There will always be girls who are prettier and who have cuter outfits and who check out your boyfriend!!! Maybe a girl who is prettier and with a cuter outfit is the one who checked out your boyfriend! But so what?  There is nothing you can do about it but hope that your man is with you for the right reasons, and if he isn’t, let him go.  Who needs him anyway?  Just don’t be ugly to other girls because it really doesn’t do anything but make you look like a petty little brat.

This leads me to my next topic: Stupid Girl Behavior and Beliefs Involving Men

Again, let me preface this by saying that I, too, am totally guilty of some of these things that I am about to discuss.  And with the fact that the statement "He's just not that into you" changed my life.  I don't understand why girls waste their time on certain guys who clearly are NOT into them.  If he isn't talking to you, calling/texting you, asking you out, hanging out with you, kissing you, introducing you to his friends, asking you to be his girlfriend, or asking you to marry him then... HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!  Stop making excuses for him!!! "He is busy! He will call!" is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.  Unless he lost his phone rescuing a baby from getting run over by a run away dumpster, there should be no excuse for him.  Everyone has this incredible technological communication ability called text messaging these days, and if he doesn't even have the decency to text you that he is busy, then he probably just doesn't want to talk to you and is just not that into you!  It takes like, what, 20 seconds to text someone if you are REALLY slow at it?  If you haven't heard from him in a week, FORGET ABOUT IT! MOVE ON!!!  Save yourself the tears and the bon bon pity party... You deserve someone who treats you like gold. 

This leads me to Twilight's NEW MOON.  While watching the movie for the second time last night I decided that Stephenie Meyer has created more than just a few monsters (of looove).  Those of you not familiar with New Moon... Well, Edward LEAVES Bella.  LEAVES HER.  To "protect" Bella from being eaten by Jasper, Edward's psuedo vampire brother with previous human bloodsucking tendencies and a lack of  strong vegetarian vampire self-control.  If a guy breaks up with you and leaves, common sense SHOULD say "He's just not that into you."  In the oh so real world of Twilight, that means he is just so in love with you that he sacrifices his own feelings to protect you.  What. Ever.  Don't make me laugh.  So somewhere in America right now, a girl is getting dumped, and is probably delusional enough to think that this boy loves her so much that he is doing it to protect her from some unknown evil and that he will return to her if she becomes a crazy adrenaline junkie and jumps off of cliffs so she can "see him."  Thank you, Stephenie.  This just looks like a lawsuit waiting to happen.  Twihards already read way too much into these books and movies as it is, and your target audience is super impressionable, so way to be!! Not.  

Let's get real, people.  Movies are not actuality.  If he breaks up with you, he's just not that into you.  And, to be honest, it is his loss.  Just hold out for the man who can't get enough of you and treats you like you are the best thing that has ever happened to him and never settle for anything less, because he is just that into you.  (Well, this is my plan...)

California Hurls.

So everyone knows that really catchy, super annoying Katy Perry song "California Gurls," right? If not, you have been living under a rock or just don't get out much because it is basically inescapable. And awful.  Disagree? Don't care. This is my blog. Stop reading it then. 

Anyway... I want to take this time to dissect this song... wait, did I say dissect?  I meant RIP IT APART. It has been playing on the radio far too long and far too often, and quite frankly, I am far too over it.  I think I was over it within the first minute of the song the first time I heard it.  Katy Perry and Snoop Dogg are rolling in the dough on this "hit single" and the amount of airtime it gets on the radio is basically absurd.  I don't think any other song has been played so much...

Here goes my "favorite" parts of the song, along with my commentary...

I know a place where the grass is really greener (what kind of grass are we talking about, here?)
Warm, wet and wild
There must be something in the water
(Believe you me, there is something in the water and Katy has been drinking WAY too much of it)

The pre-chorus is ridiculous too...
You can travel the world
But nothing comes close to the golden coast
(Man, I just LOVE California elitism. Don't you?  Apparently it is THE ONLY place to live.  In my opinion, California elitism is even worse than America elitism... you know, the opinion that America is the only place to live and is better than everywhere else and because you live there you are better than everyone else? Yes, California has great weather and lots of rich people, but aren't you BANKRUPT?!)
Once you party with us
You'll be falling in love
(We will see about that)

The chorus:
California girls we're unforgettable
Daisy Dukes, Bikinis on top (Last time I checked, Daisy Duke was from the SOUTH, and is there now a dress code for California girls?)
Sun-kissed skin, so hot we'll melt your popsicle (Ok, lame. Not everyone in California is tan, either, or hot... There are ugly people everywhere. Hate to burst your bubble.)
Oh oh oh ...  (Ran out of clever lyrics?)
California girls we're undeniable
Fine, fresh, fierce we got it on lock (What do you have on lock? The rights to looking like hussies 24-7 in your daisy dukes and bikini tops? That's fine by me...)
West coast represent, now put your hands up
Oh oh oh... (Ran out of lyrics again? Man, twice in one song! This is not going well!!)

Sex on the beach
We get sand in our stilettos (that is not the only place you will have sand...)
We freak in my jeep (Who says "freak" in that context anymore?? The 90's called... They want their term back...)
Snoop Doggy Dogg on the stereo (I have nothing to say about this except that Snoop Dogg sold out big time to be featured in a KATY PERRY song.)

To prevent further damage to my IQ I will stop.  This just gives you a taste of how stupid this song is.  Every teeny-bopper girl and gay boy in America (at least) LOVES this song... STILL!  Why? If you aren't from California you should be offended and rightfully so! It is basically saying that girls from California are hotter, more fun, and cooler (and better) than you just because they are from California.  Well I say BULL! The state you are from/live in does not make you better than anyone else. You may prefer it over other places, but it isn't better. 

Just when I thought that California elitism/worship was on the downfall, this song surfaces and makes me cringe.  The store Hollister's California worship annoyed me to no end.  The song "California" made me want to slap someone.  The show "The OC" glorified Southern California to absurdity.  The shows "Laguna Beach" and "The Hills" made California look like a glamorous cake walk full of unimportant drama and lots of shopping and rich people whose greatest trials consist of figuring out which plastic surgeon to go to.  Thank you, Katy Perry, for adding to this fantastic illusion that is California.

Hate to break it to you, but California is not that great.  Go to Compton, or google it (I recommend googling it so you don't die), and you might change your mind. 

This is not me hating on California.  It is a beautiful place.  My mom grew up there and I have family there.  I have been there many times and I love it.  I just am sick of people making it seem like it is the best and only place to live...

Twenty-something.

So for those of you who aren't aware (and shame on you!!), my birthday was yesterday.  I am 23.  Twenty-three.  Twenty-who-is-even-keeping-count-anymore? Twenty-something.  I am officially a "twenty-something." You know, that age group of people caught in that awkward stage of "I am an adult but no one takes me seriously yet."  I feel like when I was younger, people in their 20's were older and more mature, and I honestly feel like I might have missed the boat somewhere because I feel like I am nowhere close to being mature.  That could be due to my inappropriate sense of humor or blatant dislike of conventional things, or the fact that I am scared to be a grown-up and count on myself for financial stability (or lack there of), or the fact that I am sometimes treated like I know nothing about anything.

But back to the part about being an adult and no one taking me seriously yet... Why is that? Yes, I know that 23 is not old, but when I was 18 I thought that maybe the world would start to take notice that I can legally make decisions for myself, but that was not the case.  Then, when I turned 20 I thought this is the age that people start to take you seriously, but that was also not the case on account of I had an employer talk to me like I was 5 for an entire summer.  Turning 21 and 22, no difference.  I am on day one of being 23, and I can't really tell you if there has been a change, but I know that there isn't a magical age where people one day will begin to look at you like an adult.

My theory is that no one takes twenty-somethings seriously.  For some reason, college age people and older are treated about the same way high school students are treated.  Maybe the entertainment corporations have made us all seem like a bunch of indecisive and irresponsible drunks who are lovesick or neurotic and are still trying to "find themselves" or "find their place in this world," and because we don't really know yet, we cannot be fully accepted into the adult world.  Maybe the magic age is 25... And when those of us "twenty-somethings" under 25 have to specify our age, we are in the 18-24 category... still grouped with teenagers.  Maybe in two years, I will be taken seriously.  Until then... well, I guess I am just going to have to brace myself for disappointment when another "real adult" speaks to me like I am a toddler.  Can't wait.

Me.

Well, for those of you who might not know who I am (which might be kind of weird if you are reading my blog...), I will have you know first and foremost I am a sassy southern girl.  I am opinionated at times, but I have enough class to keep them (read: some of them) to myself. But when the occasion arises, for example, like now that I have a blog, I will state those opinions.  I have many random thoughts (creative, creepy, humorous, insightful, etc) and I love writing so here is my venue to do so.  Watch out blog world... (Just kidding)

Random Facts about Ashleigh (Me):
-I LOVE CUPCAKES.
-I love music.
-I love shopping.
-I love the arts.
-I love my friends and family (if you cross them, I will cut you)
-I love Jesus Christ, my savior and redeemer.
-I love reading books in one sitting when I have the time.
-I love fashion.
-My favorite color is pink.
-I am a psychology major and I want to be a marriage and family therapist.
...Wow this suddenly got boring.  Like, I got bored writing about me... Let's see... what else is there?
I don't want to chase people away by talking about myself too much, but this is my blog.  This might be a bad sign... So this blog is going to be for my random thoughts and funny encounters that I frequently have in life.  Some people just don't want to hear what you think about something, but I like getting things out of my head.  I think I am going to post some of my old rantings that I have on my computer so that other people can read/enjoy them... I find them funny, but then again, I think I am hilarious. And we can agree to disagree on that.